Fat Heffalump

No, [I’ m not gay]. I can quite happily say someone is handsome, good-looking, and I can see why someone would want to f*ck them, but I’ve never felt that way about a man myself. There is that moment in your late teens when you ask yourself the question, ‘Am I?’ but I wasn’t… Well, this year I have a talent crush on Ryan Gosling. I think he’s fantastic and, ahem, you know he’d be nice afterwards. He seems smart. If I was gay, I would go for a smart man.

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    Translation: I want to fuck Ryan Gosling.

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    It’s because he is safe. He’s not overtly macho. He’s small. He’s non-threatening. Virility is not an apt word to...

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    Same here…I recognize that he’s a good looking guy, very talented and all that, but he does not in any way shape or form...

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